“I loved you so much once. I did. More than anything in the whole wide world. Imagine that. What a laugh that is now. Can you believe it? We were so intimate once upon a time I can’t believe it now. The memory of being that intimate with somebody. We were so intimate I could puke. I can’t imagine ever being that intimate with somebody else. I haven’t been.”—Raymond Carver (via goodgracesbadbadinfluence)
“I felt like crying but nothing came out. It was just a sort of sad sickness, sick sad, when you can’t feel any worse. I think you know it. I think everybody knows it now and then. But I think I have known it pretty often, too often.”—Charles Bukowski (via deadvultures)
“What is terrible is not death but the lives people live or don’t live up until their death. They don’t honor their own lives, they piss on their lives. They shit them away. Dumb fuckers. They concentrate too much on fucking, movies, money, family, fucking. Their minds are full of cotton. They swallow God without thinking, they swallow country without thinking. Soon they forget how to think, they let others think for them. Their brains are stuffed with cotton. They look ugly, they talk ugly, they walk ugly. Play them the great music of the centuries and they can’t hear it. Most people’s deaths are a sham. There’s nothing left to die.”—The Captain is out to Lunch - Charles Bukowski (via henrycharlesbukowski)
Crowded couples sipping sucking sex. Under bleachers, student teachers know best. Yeah, well, fate is fucking romantic if you can get off on failure. Right on reds and left at an alter. “Oh, now I want to cry. I don’t try, I don’t try, I wanna die.” People say that you’re stuck on yourself just because you aren’t stuck on anyone else. Anyone else? This could kill you, but so could I. This could swallow you whole, but so could I.
“I have died too many times believing and waiting, waiting in a room staring at a cracked ceiling waiting for the phone, a letter, a knock, a sound … going wild inside.”—Out of the arms of one love, Charles Bukowski (via machodago2)